Finals Week Strategy for Success from the Person Voted Biggest Procrastinator in High School:
1- Reread notes needed
2- Open all articles you’ll need
3- Make and eat kick ass breakfast burrito
4- Write a blog post about procrastinating in an effort to destigmatize procrastination as a thinking exercise
5- Head downtown to see if that painting you loved is still for sale
6- Stop for favorite snack supplies and a couple other groceries
7- Prepare perfect movies needed for background noise
8- Play first movie & bust out some work
9- Have favorite snack
10- Bust out some more work and maybe even finish 1 paper
11- Choose 3-5 items from your closet to donate to Goodwill
12- Give yourself a facial
13- Determine if you’re done thinking about that other paper
14- Are you done? Yes? Do a little work- not tooooo much and see how you feel No? Choose a pair of shoes to donate. Yeah, that’s what I thought. Get some more work done, asshole.
15- You win! Relax and watch a horror movie or art documentary with fresh jammies and more of your favorite snack for dinner!

Stress/Distraction Strategies :
- You okay? Want a nice cup of tea? Go ahead… remember to take a sip before it gets cold.
- Whew, this is hard. You should probably take the dog out onto the deck and get some fresh air.
- Y’know, the cat’s litter box could always use a little attention. If you take care of that doing homework won’t seem so bad. Go on. I bet you won’t complain about this paper after that.
Perfect Movies Needed for Background Noise (Today):
- She Devil
- The Others
- True Romance
- Airheads
- Hook
- Matilda
Favorite Snack:
- Fresh raspberries
- Smoked salmon
- Smartfood popcorn
- Some kind of craft beer
Are there really 550 rubber bands in this package? Let’s check!